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we live the life
As Mother Theresa said, “Never worry about numbers. Help one person at a time and always start with the person nearest you”.
That I could do. My delicious nonverbal son who was navigating other issues making it challenging for him to make his way in a world that was not always hospitable, nonetheless wanted to live on his own. Recognizing he requires 24/7 support and also knowing that doing it by myself would prove to be daunting, I told everyone I met about Luke’s dream, and that I was looking for someone to share the journey.
At the same time, Susan was forging a path for her equally delicious son, Sean, who also wanted to live on his own and who also requires 24/7 support.
We were connected by our respective Service Coordinators who worked for the same agency, and so began our 2-year courtship during which we shared all matters of the heart to determine how to create a home for our sons with the support services they needed and deserved.
After extensive research, starts and stops, a somewhat exhaustive search with a realtor, while simultaneously interviewing for our 24-hour team, our sons’ dreams came true. They moved into their own home with a loving team and have never looked back. And by the way, Susan and I are happy to share the details of our experience, please don’t hesitate to contact us.
We then turned our sights toward creating meaningful engagement for them during the day. Having boasted about creating an extended family for Sean and Luke, Luke’s devoted Aunt suggested we launch an organization titled The Extended Family to do just that.
Susan’s husband dubbed us The Founding Mothers, and nearly 8 years later we are humbled to share we are exceeding our expectations.
Every Dreamer who walks through our door is our loved one, one of our founding principles is that we’re in this together. Moreover, we yearned to create a community for adults who are not compatible with traditional job settings—like our sons—yet have passions, dreams, and talents that deserve to be cultivated.
As we do for our sons we make this promise to every dreamer: you are seen, heard, valued, respected, included and celebrated for who you are.
With loving hugs, Laurie and Susan
the starfish parable is our guiding belief
Strolling along the edge of the sea, a man catches sight of a young woman who appears to be engaged in a ritual dance. She stoops down, then straightens to her full height, casting her arm out in an arc.
Drawing closer, he sees the beach around her is littered with starfish, and she is throwing them one by one into the sea. He lightly mocks her: “There are stranded starfish as far as the eye can see, for miles up the beach. What difference can saving a few of them possibly make?”
Smiling, she bends down and once more tosses a starfish out over the water, saying serenely, “It certainly makes a difference to this one.”
Every young adult with Intellectual and/or Developmental Disabilities (I/DD) and Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) deserves an opportunity to live a life filled with hopes and dreams, friendships, a sense of purpose, meaningful engagement, love, self-respect, confidence.
The Extended Family provides a community based approach to address the needs of adults who struggle with isolation after aging out of their academic settings. Some of the issues TEF addresses include:
- What happens to individuals who are unable to participate in a traditional work environment?
- How can we create opportunities for these young adults to explore and reinforce their capabilities so they may achieve their untapped potential?
- As young adults age out of the educational system, how can we continue to develop and reinforce their social skills?
- How do we make them feel VALUED members of the community?
TEF works to create a social and entrepreneurial environment that reinforces both creative and social skills in a setting that focuses on what participants CAN do rather than on what they cannot.
Meaningful engagement
The Extended Family meaningfully engages exceptional adults who rely on qualified support by providing a sanctuary for learning skills, community integration, camaraderie, and a sense of belonging where personal interests, passions, and unrecognized intellectual abilities are revealed.
The primary goals of the Meaningful Engagement model are to
- Provide a welcoming environment that facilitates trust, acceptance, and engagement, and alleviates the struggle associated with performance stress;
- Provide ongoing, skills-based classes for adults with ASD and I/DD in an environment that stimulates and challenges them;
- Offer adaptive solutions to accommodate any physical and/or emotional unique needs so that each participant can successfully engage;
- Address the effects of social rejection and its subsequent social isolation by providing opportunities for peer socialization and support;
- Nurture each participant’s ability to take on new roles, learn new skills, and contribute creatively to the group’s experience;
- Instill personal empowerment through the experience of uplifting others within their communities;
- Develop opportunities for participants to sere as ambassadors, making a positive impact in their communities and fostering more positive attitudes towards people with ASD and I/DD.
Participants actively engage in ideation, decision making, and problem solving to create and develop new creative ideas. Everyone is included in every aspect of the process. An adaptive plan is created for each individual ensuring the full participation of everyone.
At the heart of Meaningful Engagement (ME) is an environment of inclusion, collaboration and teamwork within a no-pressure, non-hierarchical structure, resulting in a keen sense of ownership, responsibility, and pride.
And most of all, we have FUN!